Saturday, December 17, 2011

Jedi Mind Trick

     Ryan stumbled into the kitchen with a huge yawn. He was still groggy from waking up, and he prepared his morning bowl of cereal with half closed eyes. It was a routine he had done a thousand times before and his motions were automatic. It wasn’t until he sat down at the kitchen table that he realized someone else was already there.
     “Geez, Dave!” he said with a jump. “You scared the living daylights out of me.”
     “Sorry,” said his roommate. Dave didn’t look up, but sat quietly at the table and stared at a salt shaker in front of him.
     “No worries,” said Ryan, now wide awake. “What are you doing up so early, anyway?”
     “Practicing,” said Dave, still staring at the salt shaker.
     Ryan took a seat at the opposite end of the table and began to eat his cereal. “How’s that working out for you?”
     Dave broke his concentration. He looked away from the shaker and rubbed his eyes. “I can’t do it if you keep distracting me, Ryan.”
     Ryan set down his spoon. “Sorry, but you’ve been working at this for a long time. Are you sure you have these powers?”
     “I told you, it's scientifically proven!” From underneath the table, Dave produced a worn-out paperback book that he shoved in front of Ryan. It was titled Harnessing Your Psychic Abilities.”
     “I’m just saying,” said Ryan, “You’ve been putting a lot of effort into this. Locking yourself in your room for weeks, meditating all day, fasting until you’re about to pass out... you’re killing yourself and you still haven’t seen any results.”
     Dave snatched the book back. “You want results? I’ll show you results, but you have to stay quiet and not create any distractions.”
     Dave took a deep breath. Then he leaned forward and once again focused his eyes on the salt shaker. His gaze was intense, and Ryan could see veins throbbing in his forehead. Dave seemed to be holding his breath the whole time. Two minutes passed before Dave finally let out a burst of air and almost collapsed, gripping the table for support.
     Dave gasped for breath. “See? What did I tell you?”
     Ryan leaned forward for a better look. “It hasn’t moved,” he said.
     “No,” agreed Dave, “but it was close. I’m telling you, I could feel it.”
     Ryan went back to his cereal. “I know you mean well, Dave, but sometimes I think we should just buy a new remote for the TV.”

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